EAR HAIR – WHO’S GOT JOKES?

(There are always jokes floating around about Desi girl stereotypes… so I decided to make some up about Desi guys. So who’s got jokes? Only ORIGINAL rebuttals will be accepted.)
THEY MIGHT LOOK THE SAME BUT HOW CAN YOU TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A GORILLA AND A DESI GUY?
~ Gorilla’s don’t have butt hair.

WHAT DID THE BEAR CUB SAY TO THE DESI GUY?
~ You still live with your mommy?!

WHAT’S THE MOST ATTRACTIVE FEATURE ON A DESI GUY?
~ His wallet.

WHY ARE SO MANY DESI MEN DOCTORS?
~ Overcompensation.

WHAT DID THE DESI GUY SAY TO THE DESI GIRL HE LIKED AT THE PARTY?
~ (trick question) Nothing. But his mom got her number.

WHY DO SO MANY DESI GIRLS PREFER WHITE GUYS OVER DESI GUYS?
~ They’re just not into dating other women (like his mother and his sister and his grandmother’s cousin’s best friend’s sister…. and his other girlfriend…).

BUT THEN HOW CAN YOU NOT ABSOLUTELY ADORE DESI MEN – MIDGETS ARE LIKE SOOOOO CUTE!

TRYING TO LOSE A WHITE GUY – TAKE OUT YOUR MACE. TRYING TO LOSE A DESI GUY – TAKE OUT YOUR CHAPPAL.

AND GIRLS, IF BY ANY CHANCE YOU FORGET HIS NAME – JUST CALL HIM OMAR/OMER/UMAR/UMER. MOHAMMAD OR ALI WILL USUALLY GET HIS ATTENTION TOO.

FREE Clinique Foundation

I knew that would get your attention.

So, granted I’m a procrastinator and this post should have been up long ago, but you still have..um..a couple days left to get perfect foundation match at Clinique counters for free. Go to your nearest Bloomingdale’s and get a 10-day supply of your pefect match foundation. The nice Clinique ladies will help you figure out the best foundation for your skin type, with the best coverage, shade, and finish option for the most natural effect. Offer lasts only as long as the month of October does, so HURRY.

And in case you’re wondering, yes, I still have yet to get off my butt and get my own…now that’s some full-fledged procrastination right there.

Happy Diwali and Eid to all our readers!

Divanee Magazine wishes all our readers a very happy diwali and very happy eid.

What are all our readers doing this season?

“A First Class Man” = A First Class Broadway

In the mood for a smart indie Broadway? A small time play with anything BUT small time talent, David Freeman’s “A First Class Man” is a fascinating true story set in the early 1900s of Indian mathematical genius, Srinivasa Ramanujan.

The seemingly aloof, but intensely spiritual, Ramanujan comes to astounding and complicated mathematical conclusions based on what he believes is God-sent intuition alone. He is brought over from India to study at Trinity College in Cambridge with the backing of English mathematician, G.H. Hardy. The play is a captivating exploration of the relationship between Hardy, an atheist and rationalist, and Ramanujan, a spiritual math prodigy. The faith vs. rationality concept in the play is especially interesting, considering today’s political climate.

The talent of the small cast blew me away. Steve French, who took the role of Hardy, plays the conflicted character with great subtlety and keeps us guessing. Amir Arison convincingly plays Ramanujan, whose complicated character of a humble but almost freakishly possessed genius reminded me of John Nash’s character from A Beautiful Mind. Vikram Somaya, who plays multiple supporting roles including Ramanujan’s teacher in India, is absolutely brilliant as he easily shifts gears between his characters and moods. Treat yourself to this refreshing Off-Off Broadway, but it’s playing for only for a few more days, so do it quick!

Oh, and a noteworthy perk: the play actually starts on time.

-SA

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Presented by AlterEgo Productions, your $18 ticket helps give minority actors an opportunity to showcase their talents. (Look for the upcoming Divanee article on AlterEgo, a not-for-profit organization of different professionals with a common passion for theatre).

Go to www.smarttix.com and type in Ramanujan. The show runs through Oct. 21st, Wed.-Sat. at 8 pm and Sat. and Sun. at 2 pm at the 45th Street Theatre, 345 W. 45th St. (btw 8th and 9th).

*Pictures courtesy of AlterEgo Productions

to veil or not to veil?

From the NYTimes: Blair Criticizes Full Islamic Veils as “Mark of Separation’

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/18/world/europe/18britain.html?_r=2&

-Miral

muslim homecoming queen a first for this town

Sana Rahim – sixteen-year-old homecoming queen

It’s nice to see a Muslim in the news for something other than the big T

Thanks to Shyema for passing this on

-Miral

Lip Service

Evidently Nars (the company responsible for some seriously awesome lip gloss) has a new lipstick shade out: “Hindu.”

I wonder what “Catholic” looks like.

hullaba what?

Indian female author, Kiran Desai, won the Booker Prize today (it’s a big deal for writers).

Her mother, also a writer, couldn’t deal with the suspense and ran away to India. We don’t get why. But congrats to Desai!

http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/news/story/0,4136,115334,00.html

-Miral

Which came first – the fashion or the egg?

Animals have mating calls; we have mating couture. Who knew? Fellas – now when you notice your ladyfriend all dolled up a bit more than normal, well, don’t say we didn’t warn ya.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/10/10/women.fertile.fashion.reut/index.html

frappachino? 250 rupees, please.

It’s not bad enough that Starbucks has slowly pushed out all the good coffee places in NYC…but expansion to India??

During your next visit to the motherland you might find yourself ordering a tall garam non fat latte.

We’re just happy with plain old masala chai.

Make Chai, Not Coffee

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/5411760.stm

-Miral